But I Didn't Say Goodbye
By Barbara Rubel

The prevalence and impact of suicide with youth is an issue of major concern in this country. As we engage in the work of suicide prevention, it is a given that we will also be involved with survivors. Some of the most memorable of these will be children. Most of us can only imagine what it would feel like to be a child faced with the loss of a loved one to suicide. Questions of "What do we do?" or "How can I help them?" quickly come to mind. To find the answers to some of these questions, I would recommend Barbara Rubel's book But I Didn't Say Goodbye (1999, Published by Griefwork Center, Inc.).

Grief and loss effect our very core. As such, I find that books intended to help young people are often just as applicable to adults. It is the child within each of us that recognizes the need to grieve openly and honestly. It is the child in us that boldly asks the questions that we adults are often too afraid, or ashamed, to verbalize. It is through the grieving of the child that we are often able to achieve healing of our own. This book offers a step-by-step approach to dealing with suicide through he eyes and voice of a child. Built into the text are places to stop and process feelings, and guidelines regarding questions that may be helpful to raise with the survivor. There is also a section on suicide prevention and awareness, survivors support resources and extensive bibliography.

But I Didn't Say Goodbye offers practical skills and insights into the process of healing, as well as ways in which we can be supportive of those around us who are in pain, especially children. I'm confident you will be able to put the information found in this book to good use.

Review by Vickie Watson